As I've been going through recording the events of my life, one of the things which has been reinforced to me is that even as I chased after and pursued professional ministry as a pastor or missionary, I was already doing the work of a pastor and missionary. It wasn't in any way most pastors, denominations, or churches would recognize. It was in seemingly chance meetings with seemingly random people who were in need of a pastor, a guide, a priest, or a counselor right in that moment, and who would not have otherwise gone to a "professional" minister.
It was in the meeting with a young man in tears in Lewiston whom I literally ran into coming out of a church and who was desperately lost trying to find his way back. It was in a fellow classmate in Bible School who had just been told he was being expelled and was in tears. It was in a young couple who had come to be married as Christians, but whom no one had thought to offer baptism. It was in a man I'd never met from Brazil contacting me because he'd read one of my fan fiction novels and asking for guidance. It was in a hotel worker who, upon seeing the clerics I was wearing, asked me privately if I would hear his confession, when I had only driven up to the hotel to see a friend visiting California. It was in a former drug addict atheist dying of Aids who just wanted to talk. It was in a woman lying in a hospital bed who'd been a "Christian" all of her life, and once again, no one had thought to offer baptism to. It was in a drug addict in the hospital for burns who'd only turned to drugs after her infant daughter died and her family and church told her she needed to be joyful, and didn't allow her to mourn or even question God openly in her pain. My ministry has been dozens of people over the decades whom I might have only met once, but the Lord acted and spoke to them through me right at the moment when and where it was needed wherever I happened to be attending to some other business usually. All I had to do was just be there, be willing, and let the Lord do the rest through me. My ministry has just been making myself available wherever I am and whatever I'm doing to whomever needs Jesus Christ through me in that moment.
I had been doing individual, personal ministry just being there and being who I was. Sure, I have done church services, preached, performed baptisms. I've written books, a blog, done YouTube sermons. But as I look at my life, my real "ministry career" has always been these one on one encounters where Jesus Christ has come through loud and clear to the person whom I've just met, and, most of the time, never meet again.
I can't help but think this is more the kind of thing that Jesus was talking about when He said, "Going into all the world, disciple the nations." "Ministry," "discipling," "evangelism," and "pastoring" aren't just recognized jobs like a paid pastor at a church or an overseas missionary on support. Making disciples, and just channeling Jesus Christ isn't just for when you're "on the clock" in an employment setting, and it doesn't always end up in starting a Bible study that becomes a non-profit religious organization that meets at 9am on Sundays. It's in every moment, in every random encounter and meeting with someone you may or may not know. It's making sure that you are submitted to and cooperating with the Spirit of Christ so that the person they see and talk to is Jesus Christ through you, and He is the one whom they encounter, hear, and by whom their paths and lives may be changed. It's in letting go of the rules, the religious laws and regulations, the proper procedures and just letting Him love and care for that person through you no matter who they are or what the circumstance. Baptizing when many churches would refuse, or require classes. Giving the Eucharist to someone not even Catholic. Withholding judgment from someone whom most would condemn. Just making time for someone in pain, in tears, and in need.
This has been my career in ministry more often than not. Most of the time without pay, without recognition, without respect from peers. Penniless, sometimes homeless, sometimes going without enough food. Tolerating verbal and emotional abuse and not responding in kind. Being told I wasn't a Christian, or not Christian enough. Accused of being in a cult, trying to start a cult, and of preaching heresy when I preach Jesus Christ. Being suspended from "official" service as a minister. But in all of these things, frequently being sent to those places where other pastors just didn't go. Talking to people that would never feel like they could talk to a "real pastor." Chasing something that I didn't know I already had and was already doing. I guess writing out all of it as I have been doing has led to a lot of revelations for me.
God didn't just give me the ministry He knew I could handle. He trusted me with something He knew others couldn't and wouldn't even try. I can only hope I've kept that trust as well as I could.
No comments:
Post a Comment